I hate losing.

The countless hours spent on stressing, retracing and emotional investments are often flushed down the toilet in a single nonsensical deadline or event. 

But does that make me a sore loser? Not even close.

While defeat may seem like a world of pain, they are not failures. Defeat is really your own personal victory. It just takes a little grit, determination, and truth-seeking to find it. It may feel awful now, but if you take the time to pay attention, the world is providing you a gift.

Defeat is an opportunity to learn something and become an expert that no other person will get to experience like you. Sure, others fail too, but one experience will never be the same as the next. No matter how similar. It will always be different depending on who is experiencing it. A valuable gift to learn from and use as you continue to grow and live.

Think about it:

Analyze Where You Went Wrong

First, the most important thing is to find the areas that went wrong. If you see where you went wrong, you can then use it to practice and get better.

Optimize Your Strategy and Skills

Defeat provides you with vital information. Defeat is showing you that the strategies you are using are not right for you. Now you know exactly where to start to improve. Educate yourself on new approaches, experiment with each one, and then practice.

Come Back Stronger

Don't let defeat keep you down. Use it as a practice round to come back stronger and turn it into an even better victory. You already got all the information you need that others will not receive without the failure you experienced. Remember, a defeat Is only damaging if you let it be and don't use the information it's giving you.

Instead, use it as motivation to be and do better every time. You already know what it's like to fail too. You know it is not as bad as it once seemed. Now you can use that energy to shine and thrive like you never have before. Often, letting yourself fail or experience failure is the best way to eliminate the fear that is holding you back from being your best self.

As you can see, defeats don't have to be as life-shattering as they may seem or feel. Get back on your feet, find what you are missing and what lessons you need to learn from it. Then come back stronger and more powerful the next time. A defeat is only a defeat if you let it keep you down.

What the professionals are saying:

“The fullness of life is in the hazards of life. And, at worst, there is that in us which can turn defeat into victory.” - Edith Hamilton

“What is defeat? Nothing but education, nothing but the first step to something better.” - Wendell Phillips

Ask yourself:

When something bad happens, think: If a man with one leg can climb the highest mountain in the world, what can you, with all your skills and determination, do?